For You:
If only you could read and understand the things I want to tell you. You're only 2 years old, innocent, humble, loving, happy, pure, and perfect. Every time I would walk into the doors of the Hollberg home, seeing your smiling face would fill my heart with joy. Often times I would drive up there just to see you, but don't tell any one else that.. They might get jealous. You taught me what loving is really all about. When you would grab my hand and say, "Toys" with such enthusiasm, i couldn't help but give in and go play with you, even if i ripped my pants once diving onto the carpet to go play with you. Every time I would hear you say my name, i would just get so excited and feel so loved. You're an angel sent from above, in just 2 short years, you have changed many peoples lives. Knowing what I know, if everything doesn't work out and you're not able to make it through this chemo and all of the struggles of having this cancer, i know that everything will be okay for you. You're a choice spirit, and one of the great ones. If this just so happens to be the last time I get to say anything to you, just know that I loved you, with all of my heart. I can't help but break down into tears realizing that which you have to go through, all the pain, anguish, all with having done nothing wrong...ever. You made me realize a lot what love is really all about...
I have always been a fan of people, and have tried my best to be as loving as I can, but hey, i'm not perfect. But getting to know you and grow to absolutely adore you, I realized more and more for myself that love, is a gift that comes straight from our Father in Heaven. But really, you are amazing. You bring your family together, and bring them so much joy. They all love you so much, and are so proud of everything you have done. I have had a picture up in my room of Jesus and a small little boy around your age walking in a meadow by a river.. when i see it i think of you, and i can't help but smile. Your name will be spoken of for a long time, i am truly honored to call you my cousin, even though you amazing mommy is my direct cousin, i still claim you as mine..because that's the closest claimage i can get. if i could call you my nephew, i would be all the more honored. Every person has struggle in their lifetime, yours just so happens to be coming on earlier than expected, and also happens to be an extremely scary thing. for me, i've gone through life struggling with personal things, never something outward or had people known. At times i would feel pity for myself, but now, as your situation has come about, i feel like such a bad person.. i've gone through life 18 years, 7 months, and 5 days now..give or take a few, and you, you're 2. who am i to go about living my life risking things? Not just for you, but for me as well, you being the great example to me, i will strive my best every day to live my life the way that you have, and the way that you loved me for. You loved me without even knowing what i was about, but you still stretched out your hand towards mine, and called out my name. I cherish the memories that i have with you, and will forever remember them. You are in my thoughts and prayers, and i wish the best for you. i know that throughout these next few days, weeks, months, years...whatever it may be, i know that you will conquer go through them as strong and that your example to your family through this will be just as great as it has been leading up to this point. i know that you don't really understand what i am saying, but Kota, i love you, with all of my heart. and i thank you for the example that you have been to me. Forever yours, your cousin, your brother in the army of God, your friend, and someone who looks up to you...Sterling
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